is this me?

[dan1tkd]

I guess I fall into this catagory. I'm not acting single yet, but I feel single at this time. Part of me wants to move on, but I could not do that to the kids right now. Maybe the day will come when I have to it for my on sanity, but that is not today.

[anewbeginning]

what do you mean? you aren't going to date yet? you feel you need to stabilize your kids first?

[dan1tkd]

We're seperated I'm at the house. We agreed it would be less stressful for the kids to stay home with me and more practical with their school and all. Plus she is not going out so I do not want to be the bad guy and be first to take that step. I'm am getting so lonely for companionship though. I guess I will continue to hold out for now.

[anewbeginning]

I understand.. you have the kids but it just isn't enough..

I wish I could help but I have no clue how to go about it.. I use the web as my constant companion.. I work from home for 9 months of the year and I live alone.. my dog and my cat are great, but sometimes...

Yeah, i get that...

[dan1tkd]

Yeah I have three cats they are my babies but that does not quite cut it. I hate to seem selfish but I'm not a good alone type of person. The web is helping at least I feel connected with others even if it not face to face.

[anewbeginning]

Yeah I have three cats they are my babies but that does not quite cut it. I hate to seem selfish but I'm not a good alone type of person. The web is helping at least I feel connected with others even if it not face to face.

Yes... just be careful... you can begin to really know someone online.. if you find someone you like to talk to, and they like talking to you... you begin to look forward to talking to them.. you can't wait.. you begin to develop feelings... neither of you looking for it.. and suddenly.. one of you backs out.. perhaps it go to be too much.. perhaps they got scared.. perhaps they found someone else... beware your heart... it doesn't take much for it to break..

[dan1tkd]

Thanks for the warning. Thinking about it I can see what you mean. Things could get complicated easily. I'm probably not in the best shape emotionally right now so I need to be careful.

[Lena]

The time will come when you feel right about doing what you want, Dan!
Anew is right, it doesn't take much for your heart to break!
Take care of it!

[Midlifecrazy]

Divorce final last week but spent last few yrs so lonely I didn't know what to do with myself. Lonliness was certainly helped by finding the companion site to this one and talking to people. You have to realize that you are vulnerable and as such, easily influenced. When I realized just how vulnerable I was, it was very scarey. Didn't like the feeling but found that realizing it helped me make better decisions. Have been lucky enough to meet someone now that has cured my lonliness problems...;)

[anewbeginning]

I am happy you have found someone midlife.. just be careful still... I met someone online who I wanted just a friendship with.. but my feelings grew.. his didn't... now he won't talk to me... I screwed up so bad... but anyhow....

[Lena]

awww.. Anew!!
His lost, for not having a friendship with you!

[Wanda Ring]

Sometimes kids pick up on the things wrong in a marriage and start to feel it's their fault. If you're able to get along well and can be civil with each other then it may not be a problem...but if there is tension between you and your spouse...kids know and act out...so you have to decide what's better for them

[LadyMoon]

Being careful is good advice. We all need to protect our hearts. It's surprisingly easy to start counting on others for emotional support on the web.. it's also easier for it to fall apart. The relationship may not have been "real" but the emotions attached certainly will be.

That being said.. making friends online can be a nice transitional thing to do. I am separated also, and we may work things out eventually, I don't know. I have no desire to meet and date IRL unless it becomes permanent. So, I have my online friends, mostly female but a couple male, and that is more than enough to sustain me right now. For me, it is currently enough to keep the loneliness at bay.

BUT... all that being said... my separation is very very recent.. not sure how long you have been in this situation. Maybe it really is time for you to try out a "real" date??