Dippy
12-16-2008, 11:38 AM
New lovers never set about exposing their ‘warts and all’ - people tiptoe around, and hide a part of themselves, until they feel secure enough to reveal all. Some people lack confidence, some don’t know their own true colours; you can’t take as accurate their honest perception of themselves. The phase of getting to know each other is a tricky one - you don’t want to prejudge someone, blow small things out of proportion, and you're wary of what you project about yourself, but there are warning signs you can listen to before you get swept away by the wrong sort of person. So, what do you think these general indicators are? Here’s a few of mine -
Your friends and family – they show little interest, but when they do eventually meet, for no apparent reason there are early tensions on both sides...more than just nervousness. There’s a noticeable bad vibe whenever they meet your friends, a rivalry, a contest. Your new friend behaves differently around them, differently around their own friends. They want to cut you off from people you know, yet not let you get to know those they hang out with.
They are rude towards, quick to scorn or criticise strangers, such as shop assistants, waitresses. They tell you stories about how poorly they’ve treat others, with a tone of pride. There’s a desire to see others fail. They single out people for derision based on their bias, discrimination. It’s not just about how they’ve treat past partners, they might remember to sugarcoat that, they are not courteous to random people, and they know it.
They form a quick attachment – they love you within two weeks, and start setting future plans. They want committed actions from you right away, such as removing your profile from dating sites. They want you to spend all your spare time together, and press you for reasons why you can’t. They check up on where you've been, who you saw. They shower you with compliments, go totally over the top about your achievements.
They reach a certain age and have little to show for it. Not worldly goods, just obvious things you can’t live well without – like more than one pan, a winter coat. It’s not just that they struggle independently; they have different priorities when it comes to spending their money. They never have cash for basic things like milk, let alone can afford to go out for dinner.
Your friends and family – they show little interest, but when they do eventually meet, for no apparent reason there are early tensions on both sides...more than just nervousness. There’s a noticeable bad vibe whenever they meet your friends, a rivalry, a contest. Your new friend behaves differently around them, differently around their own friends. They want to cut you off from people you know, yet not let you get to know those they hang out with.
They are rude towards, quick to scorn or criticise strangers, such as shop assistants, waitresses. They tell you stories about how poorly they’ve treat others, with a tone of pride. There’s a desire to see others fail. They single out people for derision based on their bias, discrimination. It’s not just about how they’ve treat past partners, they might remember to sugarcoat that, they are not courteous to random people, and they know it.
They form a quick attachment – they love you within two weeks, and start setting future plans. They want committed actions from you right away, such as removing your profile from dating sites. They want you to spend all your spare time together, and press you for reasons why you can’t. They check up on where you've been, who you saw. They shower you with compliments, go totally over the top about your achievements.
They reach a certain age and have little to show for it. Not worldly goods, just obvious things you can’t live well without – like more than one pan, a winter coat. It’s not just that they struggle independently; they have different priorities when it comes to spending their money. They never have cash for basic things like milk, let alone can afford to go out for dinner.